If you follow me on Twitter you will have seen this post and I thought that I should really explain what it was about.
About 18 months ago I suffered a back injury. It's not as scary as it sounds I promise. I slipped, slipping a lower back disc and it caused damage to my sciatic nerve leading to my left leg. This left my leg very very weak to the point that I require crutches to get about and a wheelchair for long distances. It took the doctors ages to really figure out what was going on, even took them ages to scan me, all the while this disc was delicate and there is now also a little tear in it.
I had kinda come to terms with the fact that my back and leg would be a weak point in the future but this week my physiotherapist (who I have only just started seeing! I mean I love the NHS but they have pissed me off with this situation) that I will struggle to regain 100% strength and usage of the leg ever, she couldn't even say if I'd ever get off crutches (which is a hell of an ab workout!!) and the word disabled was used for the first time.
This hit me like a brick wall! I'm only 28 years old and I was looking forward to starting a career now that the girls are getting older, but now I have to re-arrange my whole life. I have to take strong medications to keep my condition and my pain at bay and I now have to have local anesthetic injections into my lower back so that I find physio easier to bear. Im even at the stage where I have to adapt my house so that I can live easier, a seat in the shower, handrails and I have even had to give up my lovely loft conversion bedroom for one on the floor below.
The past 18 months have been the hardest of my life and if it wasn't for the support of my husband, family and friends, it's also the reason I started blogging as there isn't much you can do when your on permanent bed rest! Life for me has changed forever and it's actually help me find strength I didn't even know that I had. My situation is nothing really compared to the suffering of others out there and a blog that proves this is one of my favorites called Living with Stage 4 Cancer please give it a read and send all your love and strength to her!